Friday, April 24, 2009


We were hoping that this wouldn't soon as we are feeling settled into our new place, my boss drops me the bomb: there is a job in Hamburg for me if I want it, and if I do not take it, I will not be paid anymore. 

I am not as emotional or frustrated as I was when I found out on tuesday, so I think now is time to write about it all.

I know now that our only choice is to move to Hamburg, or to move back to the US. I feel that moving to Hamburg will be harder...we are just now feeling settled in Germany, but it has taken 3 months. I cannot imagine going through all of the paperwork, bureaucracy, and awkward German skills necessary to get Mayzie enrolled in kindergarten, finding a new apartment that suits our needs, registering in the town that we move to, starting up with language classes, even trying to get garbage cans to our house(which frickin took forever)! It is overwhelming just thinking about it and I feel very reluctant to put Jenna and Mayzie through all of this again. We found this flat in Tamm only 1 month ago and now we must leave it. I know that the situation right now is difficult and I trust that my company has done all that it can do to keep me in the Stuttgart area. I pride myself on being flexible, and a "team player", but moving here has been such a huge push for us. Things were getting easier by the day, but now, I feel like they are getting more difficult with my assignment in Hamburg.  We really want to keep this German thing going, if only because we have so much more to learn and see and do. I have read that Hamburg is a nice place to live, and we are eager to discover a new place. But to pack up all our shit, take Mayzie out of school and move again? BRUTAL. 

BIG SIGH. Even for a naivly optomistic person like myself, it's hard to stay positive with another setback. Jenna is about at breaking point. There is no one to blame, it's just a bad combination of the current economy, our timing, and our just getting adjusted. My company will pay for our move, and any costs that may incur, and will pay for 3 months accomodation for me while I decide if Hamburg is good for us (job-wise and liveability-wise). This means 3 months away from Jenna and Mayzie, which is completely un-acceptable for me and her. I am not one of those career before family kind of guys and it would be difficult to be away and not helping out. Hamburg is around 400 miles directly North, so a 5 hour train ride, or an hour flight. It is feasible for me to visit on weekends, but that will become expensive. But we go home to no jobs and the dashing of my dream (I am calling it my dream now...this is in no way Jenna's dream anymore, if it ever was).

Some minutes I feel like pressing on, pushing against the flow, others I feel like throwing in the proverbial  towel. We have been to Hamburg before, but didnt really spend any time there. It's more cultural, a larger city, closer to Holland, Berlin and Denmark, so geography isnt an would be great to discover that area. It's flat, so would be awesome for bikes. It really is just dealing with all the legwork of uprooting, moving, and knowing that it will be months before we are settled again. But it would be silly to say no to an OK paying job, to go home to no job at all. We are excited for Mayzie being here, and I am enjoying my language courses (I can tell the time now haha). I am tired of these tough decisions. 

So we told my boss that we would take the job in Hamburg. I was told the job was for 1 year at least, doing CATIA design for Airbus (airplanes) in High End Engineering's office. Would be nice to get some aerospace experience, and to use CATIA again..thats why we came over here (job-wise). The plan, as of today, is for me to go up there when I get the call (I am not sure when I will be starting...probobly a couple weeks), figure out as quick as possible if the job is any good, if we could afford Hamburg, etc. We are toying with the idea of sending Jenna and Mayzie home for 2 months while I get everything in order (apartment, kindergarten, language courses, etc). That way, she is not alone, and they can come back to Germany and ease into it a little bit. That is one option. We'll see what we come up with here...we are not even sure if it's possible to break the lease on our apartment (which we are really enjoying, DAMMIT). Hopefully a job transfer is a good enough excuse to not get charged up the ass.

The continuing drama of our life in Germany...why can't it be easy!???!?!?!?!? We are due for some ease. Maybe Hamburg is the it is on the map, with Stuttgart:

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Nick said...

whats up with the font changing?? sorry about that

DarrenDriven said...

Rough, man, rough. The truth is that we're all really tired of you and we don't want you back here. Haha... so stay in Germany.

Seriously, this is not a failure, it is a success in polishing your moving and adaptation skills. Think how easy it will be the next dozen times they tell you to jump!

Plus, I can afford a hamburger way more than I can afford a Porsche when I visit, so its win-win for both of us. :)

Nick said...

yeah, for anyone reading this that would like to move overseas, or anywhere...DON'T DO It. CHANGE IS BAD.